If you are compatible with your other important people there are 8 ways to judge

Tall, charismatic, fun, intelligent, accomplished, sharing your hobbies - When it comes to dating, we all have our "wish list." But these features have little to do with compatibility and long-term happiness, says Rachel Needle, a psychologist at the South Florida Center for Marriage and Sexual Health. “In addition, compatibility is not all or nothing. It exists in a continuum.” Similarly, when you experience something new and change someone, your ideal match may change in your life, Match.com Justin R. Garcia, an assistant research scientist at the Kinsey Institute, said. This is another reason why you should not over-emphasize the traditional Mr.Mrs. The right standard. So if compatibility is a moving target, how do you determine if someone is the best match for you now and in the future? Read some amazing clues.

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1. You love each other BO

If you don't care about his sweaty fitness bag The smell may actually be a good thing. “The smell of our partner may be one of the most intoxicating or offensive elixir,” said Manhattan-based marriage therapist Paul Hokemeyer. “If you like the smell of a partner, then your relationship is likely to last.” This may be because our natural fragrance is related to the genetic makeup of our immune system – from an evolutionary perspective, we hope to complement those with us. The biology and help us get along with healthy offspring, says Kinsey Institute researcher Justin R. Ga. RCIA. For example, a 2002 natural genetics study found that women like the smell of men, and the genes of these men match the genes of the father. Researchers believe this helps women choose their spouse who knows instinctively that they have healthy genes.

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2. You talk to each other

[ 123] This is not just your dateBut what he or she said. Studies have shown that people with similar communication styles – both verbal and written – are more compatible. For example, in the 2010 Psychological Science Research, speed dating people who used similar language patterns to talk to each other were more likely to get together on the second date and after three months. LANGUAG similarity is even more predictive of relationship stability than the actual conversation between two people! Researchers believe that when we match language style to other language styles, we will pay more attention to dialogue. At the same time, when someone speaks to us in a way similar to our communication, it is easier for us to understand what he said and his intentions. Both have a stronger relationship.

Source: Comstock Pictures / Stockbyte / Getty Images 3. You complement each other

Of course, you are always like this to yourself. But different relationships have different characteristics in all of us - some are good and some are not. So what did your important other people bring to you? What did you bring to him or her? "If you and your partner like each of you to be the person in this relationship, this is a very good sign," said psychotherapist Ken Page, who is the author of "Deeper Dating." However, playing the best of each other does not mean changing each other. “This is a very different feeling, just like you have to fix yourself in order to be loved and accepted,” he said. “This relationship may motivate you to be a better person. It may require change to be difficult. But there is a basic sense of correctness in the connection, which is a sign of compatibility.”

Credit : Adobe Stock / vectorfusionart 4. You are financially synchronized

Love and money are tricky. However, it is important for m to make more money than each of you. It is the right way for each of you to think of it. “Having a similar relationship with money will increase your long-term compatibility,” says marriage therapist Paul Hokemeyer. “So if she spends money, she doesn’t have the designer handbag that’s too expensive, and you’re worried about having enough hidden in oneOn rainy days, your chances of success in love and life are severe. In a study published in the magazine Family Relations in 2012, researchers tracked 4,500 married couples and found those who argued about money early in their relationship (regardless of their income, debt or net worth). Both are more likely to divorce. Moreover, according to the study, the divergence of money is the biggest predictor of divorce compared to any other conflict.

Credit: Ridofranz / iStock / Getty Images 5. Both of you are willing to work

Not just your job - but in your relationship. "Every relationship has its problems," psychotherapist Ken Page said. And I am not talking about stupid little problems. Quite simply, our worst personality deficiencies will play a role in the relationship in a timely manner. Those who work tirelessly to continue their efforts, work hard, and do not give up the greatest compatibility and the greatest long-term success opportunities. “A study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology in 2012 found that couples willing to make sacrifices in their relationship can do this better. Their problems are obvious and more likely Lasting and satisfied marriage.

Credit: Adob ​​e Stock / WavebreakmediaMicro 6. Both of you are on the mission of adapting to health

psychotherapist Kempe says you don't have to go to the gym every day or take a healthy cooking class to stay compatible, but if one of you is a healthy nut, then if both of you are helpful, but more importantly, each of you is exercising. The frequency or the amount of vegetables you eat is your personal and shared attitude towards healthy living. “It's not just about sharing,” says Page. “It's about sharing a positive, value-based lifestyle, Improve their lives. This is quiet and share a sense of mission every day. Helps love grow and deepen. “Reward: Social and spouse support can increase your chances of success in your healthy life.

Credit: Martinan / iStock / GEtty Images 7. The same thing you want

It's time to think about the cold, the tough, the terrible future. Researchers at the University of California at Berkeley, Carolyn Pape Cowan and Phil Cowan, refer to their first longitudinal study of their parents. "Partners become parents: a big change in the lives of couples." They found that 100% of children have children. Heterosexual couples, where husbands do not want to be parents, their children divorced when they were six. It's important to visit your core values ​​and what matters to you, says psychologist Rachel Needle. While compromise is part of any relationship's health, if your basic desires don't match, your life is not compatible.

Credit: Image Source White / Image Source / Getty Image ] 8. You are a friend and lover

"There are two parts of the relationship: friendship and passion "Psychotherapist Tammy Nelson said he is the author of "New Monogamy." A peer relationship is a relationship, the ability of a roommate, the ability to live together, the life of a couple. Pornography is the place where passion lives, great sexual life takes place, the intimacy of your relationship, the sacred space is created," she said. If you have a great companion partner ip, if you are a good friend, do Good roommate, and you can hang on the sofa together, then you are the compatible person in that area. If you have a good sex life, regular climax by focusing on each other's happiness, and exploring new and more exciting ways to find adventures in intimate life, then you are sexually compatible. If you have two, then today you should marry that person. "

Credit: Kraig Scarbinsky / Digital Vision / Getty Images Are you compatible?

Infinally, although your interests, values, communication methods and even Biology can make you more or less compatible with your spouse, partner or date, but psychologist Rachel Needle says there is no final test for true compatibility. Find your ideal mat e a trial and error questionquestion. Justin Garcia, a researcher at Kinsey Research Institute, says that in each relationship, you will learn more about what you want and what you need, and what makes you click with others.

Credit: g-stockstudio / iStock / Getty Images What do you think?

So tell us what is the biggest sign of compatibility in your own dating life? What are you looking for in your partner? Share your appointments, relationships and marriage suggestions and experiences in the comments section below so that others in the Livestrong.com community can benefit from your wisdom!

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